Author Archive for jcassermere

How To Lose A Cat In 10 Minutes (on purpose)

 Surprised cat               Kamikaze kitten               Vicious

     They shred curtains and rip the upholstery on chairs.  They shoot to and fro like lightning bolts, knocking plant stands over and tripping up unsuspecting pedestrians.  And when actual lightning strikes, they painfully cling to their owners’ lower legs and shoulders with vehemence. Cats, otherwise known as felinus catus, are the #1 pet in the US.  Despite cat habits and quirks, many cat owners say they love their furry friends too much to ever let them go; but there are times when they must.  “I was moving and I just couldn’t take my cat Sam with me, so I took her to my local shelter,” said James Cassermere, an Ossining resident.

     Shelters like the SPCA take in unwanted cats and dogs as well as provide low cost spaying and neutering.  Ossining and Briarcliff residents like having the SPCA in the neighborhood.  “Lots of people I know got their pets from the SPCA,” said Sarah Rijos, a dog owner, “And I know of people who have rescued dogs and cats and taken them there.” 

     Cassermere’s local SPCA accepted Sam, despite the fact that she was not “fixed.”  However, about a week later, Sam was spotted near Cassermere’s former residence.  “People mentioned that they had seen Sam outside my house,” he said, “So I watched out for her for a few days, but I never saw her, just some other ones that hang out in the neighborhood.”

     Some is an understatement.  Upwards of six furry little friends had joined up and created a feral cat colony. A major issue in cities like Atlantic City and San Diego, even NYC and its suburbs have a problem. 

     The Briarcliff SPCA started a Feral Cat Task Force last year to address the situation in the suburbs, offering rental cages to catch the cats to be brought back to the SPCA for treatment and evaluation.  According to Westchester.com, following treatment, some cats are put up for adoption and others are spayed or neutered and returned to their colonies.  So if you happen upon a pride of cats in your neighborhood, seek out a local shelter or organization offering humane feral cat services. 

Pictures: http://www.spokesmanreview.com/, illustratedlibrarian.blogspot.com, falafelsex.blogspot.com

The Hole Story

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Each year, in the months following major snowstorms, drivers and pedestrians alike can place sure bets on one thing, there are going to be massive potholes on major and minor thoroughfares. For suburbanites, that means remembering the exact location of the craters, because both main and back roads resemble the cheek of an acne-afflicted teenager hell bent on picking at the scabs. The faces made in reaction to that last sentence mirror the faces of motorists in Ossining, NY. “They create a hazardous situation, not only for the driver,” said Andrea Carson, Ossining resident, “But also for others on or around the road.”

Not to mention damages to vehicles. If a 2005 Toyota Camry, the 3rd top selling vehicle in 2005, according to Automotive News, hit a pothole and popped the right side tires, it would cost over $160 to replace them at Mavis Discount Tire in Ossining, NY.

In 2004, however, New York State responded to complaints concerning the holes by setting up a hotline. So if you happen to be on a NYS thruway or highway and you spot what looks like a meteor impact site, be a good citizen and dial up the state at 1-800-POTHOLE.

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Snow Day!!

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To children, snow days are gift from above. Where exactly? Clouds. When fat, frosty flakes fall at warp speed covering everything uncovered, what was supposed to be a day of education quickly turns into a day of recreation.

However, many in the “real” world have an altogether different experience. “Snow days are actually broke days for me,” said Allison Brown, music teacher and teaching assistant, “because I work two part-time jobs and get paid by the hour.” Similarly, many working parents are forced to take personal days because their children are home, babysitters can’t get to them, and day care centers are closed. And even those who find childcare are faced with extremely dangerous road conditions and extended commuting times.

Unfortunately, residents also pay a considerable price due to the cost of snow removal. In the Village of Ossining, taxes increased 10% this year. According to the budget, $361,440 was budgeted for snow removal this year, up almost 12% from last year.

With that said, there are some working adults sharing in the kids’ merriment over snow days. Village workers, snow plow operators, and yard shovelers wake up extra early to greet the day and earn some pay. Michael James, freelance plower and yard maintenance worker, welcomes snow days with open arms. “When the snow stops, it’s easy money. If you work for the Village, it’s easy money too because you’ll be working even beyond when it stops, and you’re getting paid time and a half.”

*Snowflake template

Step On A Crack, Get Some Cash Back

 

Not too long ago, I watched Pretty Woman, said “NO” to drugs, and busted my knee open on Park Ave.  The fast track to riches these days always seems to involve sex or drugs. But for New Yorkers, civil lawsuits could be a burgeoning career. For all aspiring “working girls” the Bunny Ranch in Nevada is too far, and if you’re reading this you’re probably not willing to compromise your education with a felony drug charge. So where do the lawsuits come in? There are options. According to the New York City Independent Budget Office, the top 5 ways to make money from suing the city are: medical malpractice claims, sidewalks, motor vehicle claims, other personal injury claims, and (drumroll please) police actions! In 2004, the city paid out a whopping $576 MILLION to claimants. So, next time you meet and greet the cold concrete because there’s a gaping hole in the sidewalk, remember, you could be taking a bite out of the city’s budget pie.  Too bad I missed my chance!